I got to the point I believed that in almost everything I have become, I am destined to fail. I cried until my eyes and face were numb that I could hear and see myself crying, but not feel a thing at all. I have wasted a day in such a regime that I do not even recall it being productive, unless you want to call 'crying' a much noted activity.
The reason I was crying was that in all my life, I have never felt so sad that I just broke down. Everybody was moving along and i was stuck standing between the tears and friends who always remind me of how much they care. I seemed to forget about everyone for what seemed like hours and it was only a couple of seconds that I completely zoned out and thought of failure, losing the most important person in your, realising that it can all come to an end, how I have changed and how everything can be so clear yet you are blind to it.
I have come to understand that I was probably thinking too much of how it can all go bad, when in the light of a new day, it can be great. I smile at the thought of creating a new person, not different but more open to possibility, love, peace, forgiveness yet not forgetting, accepting death, stop with the mood swings already, taking risks once in a while and embrace being human.
#justBEstrong...xoxo
