I have never gone through a phase where everything seems like a blur at the moment. Contrary to popular belief, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, but with me the apple seemed to stay on the tree. I love my family but somehow I only love my dad via default... Like I am supposed to... With the apple story I do not want to believe I am in fact my father's daughter. I have tried by all means to understand him and understand his connection to me but, never have I felt so distant from the one person who is the male version of me in about 30years.
When you have tried and actually did your best, you move on. I have moved on from trying to make him see what is right before his eyes and sad to say that, I need him more than anything. I need him to assure me that he loves me. I need him to visit me and have unnerving but amazing conversations. I need him to let me know about the birds and the bees. I need him to acknowledge that I am almost the woman he has always wanted me to grow into... with more flaws than one. I need my dad, the one that took me to the theme park and watched me like a halk, so that I don't get lost. I need my dad. I need my father. I need the one man who will always have my best interests at heart.
#what it takes to fix a broken relationship, is more than just an apology...
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